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This is one of those times where I had a grand concept and never finished it. My description of the concept from late August 2005:
“Anyway, a bit about the song: It started off as an idea called “Sell 5 Million Copies of Your Album in One Easy Step”, and was basically making fun of certain bands *COUGHGREENDAYHACKCHOKEWHEEZE* for desperately trying to extend their careers by becoming “politically and socially relevant” without really knowing what the hell they were talking about. I eventually got the idea to expand it into a trilogy called…I’m not quite sure yet, but it’ll be along the lines of “Rage Against The Machine While Extracting Maximum Profit by Happily Functioning as a Nameless Cog in the Same Machine You’re Raging Against”, wherein the first two parts would almost lead you to believe I’m anti-war and whatnot (My basic political views as they’re relevant to this song in a nutshell: We should’ve kicked Saddam Hussein’s ass ten-plus years ago, and then everyone including Bush should’ve known that the “War” proper would be the easy part), and the last would reveal that “IT WAS ALL A SETUP! (Said in the style of your favorite professional wrestling announcer)” and I really only said those things because I knew idealistic college students will eat up anything anti-Bush. As it turns out, this is said third part, so it’ll lose a lot of its impact, but oh well. Call it paying homage to Rush’s Fear Trilogy if it makes you feel any better. Vocally, I end up attempting to imitate various singers–randomly, see if you can pick any of them out, but I doubt it–and end up failing at pretty much every single one.”
Obviously, I never finished the concept, but I actually like this song still, even if it will inevitably wind up dated (If it’s not already). The distorted tone on this is actually not totally terrible, so I’m pretty sure this is another all-bass track instrumentally. The other noteworthy thing is the completely unnecessary side trip into a walking bass line, in 6/4 no less, which illustrates what happens when someone influenced heavily by progressive rock tries to write a short song–generally, it doesn’t happen.


Now I don’t follow politics unless they’ll make me money!
So I’ll get rich by jumping in, tell you what you want to hear
I’ll tidy up your discontent and sell it in a friendly form
And now I’ll criticize George Bush! You know you like it, buy it here!

Is this how I feel? (First time)/Do I really feel this way? (Second and third time) Who knows!
Are these my convictions? Who cares!
Will you eat it up like sheep? You bet!

See I can join your raucous ways and dilute your punk rebellion
Bush runs our country to the ground! Where’s our freedom now?
Now why should I be subtle here? No I won’t sugarcoat my point
Can he govern any worse? If you think so, tell me how!


Ha ha! Time for a walk!

I rock against Republicans when it’ll turn me profit
Yeah, get us right out of Iraq! What do we need oil for?
Of course you knowJohn Kerry was the magic cure for everything
See? Look, I’m joining your dissent, you corporate puppets, money whores!


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